the archives of my old site. No longer regularly maintained.
Killing Time. Sharon has not been feeling up to much this afternoon (understandably) so we've been killing time (and trying not to kill the kids) all afternoon. Predictably I've spent mine messing around on the PC. I've joined a couple of webrings recently so I was surfing through them to see what's out there and the sites they mention.
- Rackbrowser - A list of weblogs whose female authors have photographed and submitted their breasts (clothed or unclothed) to be used as an image link. Kinda re-awakens the 16 year old perv in me I guess (re-awakens, who am I trying to kid). Not for those of strong political correctness.
- blogblogbaby.com - One of those blogs that grabbed my attention and kept me reading for ages. There are some excellent re-skinning options too! Can be read in conjunction with her husband's blog at excessbloggage.com
- Nintendo Paper Models - JPGs that you can scale to a page, print out and then cut out to make 3D models of Nintendo characters. I'm going to have to make the Pickachu one for Chloe sometime. It'll make her day.
- asciipr0n.com - The logical extension of ascii art. As funny as it is rude.
- Sinfest - an excellent "online only" daily cartoon strip. I found this ages ago but forgot the name and address so I'm glad to have found it again.
- Alex's Restaurant - Another excellent online cartoon
Good News. What an excellent day so far! Sharon is home again and feeling much more comfortable for it. She has been told to do just minimal amounts of activity, to eat small amounts frequently and to drink lots. Hopefully if she can manage this she won't have to go back in until the baby is due on the 24th.
Plus.... when we got home I had a phone call from the recruitment consultants who got me the interview on Wednesday to say that they want me back for a second interview. Apparently its me and one other person in contention.
Bad News. 'Doomed' Arrows facing extinction. "The Arrows Formula One team are fighting to resolve a financial crisis that has brought them to the brink of collapse." A good friend of mine used to work for the Arrows team. F1 can ill afford to lose another team this year following the collapse of Minardi at the start of the year. I think the sport is walking a tightrope and this could prove to be the critical season. Ferrari's domination is not doing the sport any good and more than counters the increased competative action behind them on the track. Coupled with questions about the way the sport and teams are financed it's possible that the sport could be at the start of a slippery slope.
Ugly News. I used to read the Daily Mirror regularly, despite its politics being slightly more left wing than mine. However over the last few days it really has sickened me. Yesterdays OTT anti-American headline was bad and now they
have a go at Tim Henman because he is apparently not putting enough passion into his "air punches" after winning points. Jesus H Christ! Is this really
front page news? Give the guy a break will you? It makes the paper look nasty, negative and desperate for publicity.
Empty. Sharon's mum has had the kids overnight for the second night in a row tonight. Despite the extra work it would have been to get home and get them into bed, despite the tantrums that Chloe throws because she's upset and worried about her Mum, despite the fact that Jimmy would have woken me up at least twice during the night and got me out of bed before 7am, I miss them and I wish they were here. The house feels dead without them.
Full. Real dairy ice cream and Belgian chocolate sauce. An excellent short term distraction from what ails you. Sometimes I understand what some of my friends mean when they say I should have been born gay or female.
America - Rogue State? The Daily Mirror today launched a
scathing attack on the US for its actions in Afghanistan and on Tony Blair for the UK governments complicity. WHAT A LOAD OF BO**OCKS!! I will agree that some of the foreign policy decisions made by George W Bush are questionable but what, in all honesty, does the Mirror expect the U.S. and the UK to do when faced with the threat that Al Qaeda and its sponsors, The Taliban, posed?
The article concentrates on the number of civilians reported to be killed or injured by American or Coalition fire during the was against the terrorists. What it neatly skips over is the difficulty of identifying genuine "innocent victims". The Taliban and the innocent Afghans form part of the same community, wear the same clothing and often live in the same buildings. I do not condone the killing of anyone who is not directly involved in actions against the west, but war and defence cannot be carried out clinically. If we shy away from so called "collateral damage" then you invite the enemy to take human shields like Sadam did.
There are some genuine points for concern in the article, such as the level of influence that oil concerns may have on the battle strategy. Unfortunately they are lost behind the vitriolic and publicity seeking headline.
Will somebody press <PLAY>? Ever get that feeling that your life is on <PAUSE>? You go about the daily activities but you don't seem to be any further along. Sharon is still in hospital on a drip due to her dehydration and lack of nutrition. It feels like we will be stuck here until the baby is delivered on the 24th. With a bit of luck, if she is sufficiently re-hydrated she will be able to come home tomorrow.
We had a visit from the consultant registrar this morning, the doctor who fills in when the patients Consultant isn't around. He diagnosed Sharon as having a sickness bug and said that as soon as we cured that everything would be fine. I'm afraid I lost my rag a little. He clearly was not aware of Sharon's case history and even I could tell she wasn't suffering from a bug. I put my foot down and demanded that Sharon's consultant, who is aware of her full history, came to see her. This afternoon she came and had a good in-depth chat with Sharon and me about her symptoms and about the reasons why she did not wish to bring the cesearean section any further forward. The practical result was the same as diagnosis of the registrar but for completely different reasons and we understood why it was being done. Sometimes you have to put your foot down and demand the attention you deserve.
Does my opinion matter to you. In my inbox this morning was the following:
Hello
I found your site via my page tracker.If you're going to talk about me, please at least it be something nice.The nice thing about blogs is reading about people with lives completely different from yours , the bad thing is people who write about your page on theirs like they are some sort of critic or something.
Zoe
My reply:
It was not my intention to upset or insult you and what I wrote was not a critique or criticism of your site. It was merely a comment on whether or not your site was the kind of thing I personally wish to read. As such it says far more about me than it does about you, and that is, perhaps, the point of my weblog. There was nothing in the statement that was in any way derogatory to you.
Regards
theaardvark
Just one damn thing after another! Sharon's back in hospital this evening. She has not been able to eat anything bigger than a single slice of toast without throwing it back up since Tuesday last week; over 7 days. I was worried about her and spoke to the midwife. She recommended I took her back to the hospital for tests. They in turn stuck her with needles, hooked her up to a drip and told us they were keeping her in over night.
Sharon really didn't want to have to stay overnight because she is far more comfortable at home and therefore more able to cope with the constant pain and discomfort caused by the frequent contractions that she is having. In her current over tired and vulnerable state this news reduced her to tears and it has really upset me leaving her there.
For a man who "doesn't do emotions" this last week has been a roller-coaster.
Hope for the future. I think my job interview went well this morning. I felt the business in my new suit and shoes, had some confidence from the research I had put in and was awake and alert from the can of Red Bull I necked immediately before the interview. I was caught out at one point when the VAT adviser they had brought in asked me about some VAT cases in the news but I was honest and said I hadn't been able to do technical work due to the time and resource constraints at my last job.
Just passin' time. Before Sharon went in and after I got home, I've had lots of time to kill. So I've been "blog hopping"; clicking on the random
Blogsnob link in the right-hand column to see where it takes me, then clicking on the random link that site should have. The following is a list of sites I reached or interesting sites they linked to.
- Anonymous Zoe - This appears to be the archetypal female American blog. I read a few of the entries but just couldn't empathise (or even sympathise) with any of it. I know that's rich coming from someone who seems to have done nothing but whinge and publicise his depression for the last few days. Sorry. Compare and contrast with Confessions of a Hootress.
- Poltical Compass. - The simple left/right or communist/fascist idea of politics is way out of date. Find out where you stand by taking this simple test. My results were "Economic Left/Right = -0.75, Authoritarian/Libertarian: -3.49" which came as a bit of a shock to someone who had always thought his views were slightly right of centre.
- Green Fairy dot com. - A weblog. Vicious, apparently misogynous and definitely wrong about a large number of things (IMHO) but strangely readable.
- Albino Blacksheep - An excellent collection of Flash movies, games and movies. My personal favourites are this and this, though for very different reasons.
- Wrecked Exotics. - On the assumption that no-one was hurt (and I will make that assumption for the sake of my conscience) there is some kind of poetic justice to these pictures. Especially for a man who still sulks over the fact that he had to sell his sports car (an MGF) to support a family. (Sharon already had 2 kids when we got together so I had to make some adjustments to my life).
- The ultimate MPV. - Need to transport 8 kids and a dog but want to get there at speed? Renault have the answer. Bet the fuel economy is shite though!
- Playing with Lego - Build your own Lego character. Good fun but short lived.
- From outerspace to innerspace. - A Java movie showing a journey from 10 million light years away from earth all the way down to the surface of an atom. Fascinating.
- Naked Aardvark. - Really?
Lethargy. Despite having lots to do and the desire to get it done, today I seem to have achieved very little of what I was intending. I was supposed to do some research for the job interview I have got tomorrow and I've only spent about half an hour on it. I wanted to write some letters and ring some disco clients but never quite got around to it. James spent 2 1/2 hours in school this afternoon which should have been my ideal opportunity but before I knew it, 2 hours had gone by and I'd done nothing but watch TV.
Tantrums. I have been reduced to tears this evening by James' temper tantrum. He's not a bad kid, but like most 3 year olds has the odd tantrum. Tonight, on top of everything else that is happening, I have no shame in saying it just got too much. for 25 minutes he screamed and cried and stamped and pushed. I had to lock him in his room for a couple of minutes when I lost it but after I got me head back together I sat in his room with him until he got it out of his system. You wouldn't believe how tiring it is.
Wish me luck! I have a job interview tomorrow at 9.45am (UK time). The job sounds interesting and I am quite keen to land this one. I should really put up a comments box for moments like this.
Affordable Time Travel. I found the
The Time Travel Fund today. You know, its such an audacious and ingenious idea that I was almost tempted to give it a go. the basic premise is this: If you invest a small amount now (they ask for $10), in 500 years time it will be worth $$$$$BILLIONS$$$$$! On the assumption that time travel has been invented by this point, it would be enough to pay for them to travel back in time to collect you to take you to the future. It kept me amused this afternoon.
Voyeurism. There's something distinctly seedy about
spying on other peoples search phrases. Especially when they are searching for things like
three dead trolls in a bag
,
lolita joy and
elvis costello lyrics.
Darwin Awards. I've just received my
Darwin Awards newsletter. It has kept me entertained for months. If you've never been over to the site, it's well worth a look.
News. With the kids in bed and Sharon fast asleep, I've had time to catch up on what's happening in the world.
Aussies follow in the footsteps of Willow (Buffy reference). Is it just me or does there seem to be a growing discontentment with the traditional organised religions? Even more so over the last couple of years.
Big Brother ratings improve again. Why? This year they seem to have made a complete hash of the contestant selection. I don't empathise with any of them and couldn't care one iota what they get up to. They're all a little too childish and obvious wannabes. Sandy was the only one I liked and they gave the housemates so little to do he left out of sheer boredom. Even the website is getting more hits than last year despite the fact that they are charging for the live video this year. Just goes to show that the world is full of mugs.
Hero schoolgirl 'took overdose after years of bullying'. This is just sad. Do parents these days instil so little respect in their children that the selfless act of this young girl became a subject for ridicule? I watch the children around our town these days and they seem to have no respect for anything. I don't live in a rough area but the phone box on the corner of our street has its windows smashed at least once a week, and I understand that the police know who is doing it but can't take any action. Sometimes you just have to despair.
Is it Monday? My first week day out of a job. Given how much I hated my last employment, I find it strange how depressing it has been today. It's not even like we're going to be desperate for cash until half way through August. I was up at 8am with James but even after my normal coffee I just haven't been able to wake up all day. I feel lethargic and de-motivated. If I let myself stop, I don't get started again. A half hour watching television rapidly becomes 3 hours slobbed out on the sofa. As I am now responsible for running the house I can't let this happen.
3 1/2 weeks. Sharon seems happier today although she has her moments of upset. I think she is slowly getting used to the concept of 4 weeks of total bed rest and the fact that she has a choice - either she suffers the pain of labour for 4 weeks or she takes the pain killers which leave her dizzy, confused, disorientated and unable to concentrate. She has settled for the latter and I think, in accepting it, is now dealing with it better. She repeatedly apologises to me for not being able to do anything and tells me she's worried that I'm doing too much. However, I'm sure that I'm not doing anything that any single mother does every day of her life. I have a renewed respect for all housewives/husbands and "home-makers".
Never leave your PC. Not enough time in your day to update your blog or play your online game?
Try this, it'll add vital minutes to your available time.
See your baby grow. An
'educational' keyring? Some people have the strangest ideas as to what will sell.
Support. Just a sample of the messages of support that I've been getting over the last few days.
- Very sorry to hear that... Wishing you all the luck in the world for your wife and new baby. Hope everything works out ok. Lmr xx
- I'm sure everything will work out ok and you;ll have a lovely little baby at the end of it.
- in labour for 4 weeks?! ouch!!!hope you and sharon are fine though, you are in my thoughts
- she is very lucky to have u mr ardvark! hope she is ok...
- I'm sorry to hear/read that Sharon is so uncomfortable. I wish I could offer some words of wisdom but all I can come up with is "Hang in there." And it seems that you've all been doing that already. I'll be reading, Deirdre.
- oh jesus, stuff like this makes my heart break, i wish i could help you out in some way but i guess all i can say is my thoughts and prayers are with you, this is happening for a reason hun, hang in there
- im sure everybody on this board will agree when i say.... ...SEND ALL OUR LOVE TO YOUR WIFE AND KIDS!!
- Bit of a shock fella, but they're in professional hands. Keep us informed, thinking of you all K&K. x
Thank you to everyone. It helps through the tough times to know people are thinking of you.
Disgust. I showed my mum the
dummies we bought for Connor today. She was absolutely disgusted and even went so far as to compare it to the picture of a
baby dressed as a suicide bomber that has been in the news recently. A touch harsh I thought.
Limits. Today started so well. Sharon's mum had James and Chloe over night because I was working so I got a bit of a lie in this morning. I phoned her at 10am to say I'd be round in a bit. "No you won't" she said, "I'm taking them to the Zoo for the day so you and Sharon can spend some time together". Sometimes her Mum can be a real pain in the neck, but then she comes through with something like that.
So we stayed in bed and watched the World Cup Final (we're not into football but the was bugger all else on). I have to say, I actually enjoyed watching it, which is probably only the second football match I can say that about. Sharon was a lot brighter although still in pain. It seemed like her body was getting used to it and tuning it out.
Unfortunately the afternoon went downhill. We took advantage of being kid-less and Sharon came with me to do the shopping. We were only out for half an hour but by the time we got back Sharon was in so much pain that she was in tears. And then she got really upset because if she can't manage a half hour shopping trip then she is virtually confined to the house. After that I had a little feeling sorry for myself (or rather us) session and got nothing done around the house. I managed to sort myself out in time to go pick up the kids though.
Friends. Fidget, run by my good friend
Barry Diston celebrated its 1st birthday this morning. Its one of the maddest night club events around and I used to spend the occasional Sunday morning there when it first started. Its a shame I couldn't make it today but life has its priorities.
The outside world. It hard keeping track of the rest of the world at the moment.
Big Brother is apparently hotting up but I really can't work up any interest in it this year. However, I did see
this on
Ananova today. Has the world gone completely mad? Giving drugs to prisoners before release so that they can build up a tolerance? Surely they should be working toward keeping them off drugs? Just a suggestion.
Saturday. Sharon is still feeling uncomfortable but seems to be a lot happier for being at home. Everybody is chipping in and helping out with the kids and the house work. some friends had James and Chloe for 2 hours and my Mum turned up today and ran off with all the ironing (probably about 3 weeks worth to be honest). Tonight I've got my first disco for a couple of weeks and Sharon will be in the house on her own. I'm not particularly comfortable with the idea but the discos are our only source of income now. I've got another DJ helping out tonight so that if I need to rush off he can take over.
that's a nice rock!
me:
sex:male
age:30
status:married
children:3
Listening:
Barry Diston:Unreleased Stuff
Reading:
Weblogs
Terry Pratchett
Maps
Watching:
Bugger all at the mo, to be honest
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